Tag: asexual

oh-good:

It’s a amazing, whenever people talk about their asexuality they’re told it’s their Romantic Orientation that truly matters, and when people talk about their aromanticism they’re told it’s their Sexual Orientation that matters. What they’re really saying is that the A aspect of a person doesn’t matter. Who we are doesn’t matter. We are what they say we should be and our place is where they decide it is.

My asexuality is not a modifier, it is the most prevalent part of my orientation. Do not tell aces or aros that those aspects of their identity are just modifiers to the other part. If you are not ace/aro you have no business defining those orientations, and even if you are ace/aro you have no business defining other people’s identities for them. Your asexuality may be a modifier for your romantic orientation but it may not be the same for others. Stop telling other people how to identify.

acesthetic-of-hearts:

I like you.
The idea of holding your hand gives me butterflies.
Your hugs are amazing, I’d like them all the time.
The thought of kissing you gently makes me blush.

I’d like to maybe ask you out.

Because I like you.
Your personality.
How we share interests.
And I think we’d be good together.

But I’m terrified of it all.

Because what if you don’t accept that I’m asexual.
What if we start dating but then you think I’m leading you on.
Or worse, what if you think you can change me and force me into a situation I’m uncomfortable with.

What if we’re just not compatible as a couple because I’m ace and you’re not?

I don’t want to lose you as a friend because of that.
But at the same time, I don’t want to be just friends with you.
Because I like you.
I really like you.
But just not sexually.

Books by ace-spectrum authors with ace-spectrum main characters

asexual-representation:

When it comes to asexual representation in books, I’m most
interested in reading ace main characters written by ace authors. Ace side
characters are always great, but I really love getting the ace character’s
point of view, and I believe authors who are ace themselves are best equipped
to pull that off realistically. Thinking about this, I ended up making the
following list of all the books/series I could find that have an ace-spec MC
(or at least a point-of-view character) and were written by an ace-spec author.
Click the links for more info and discussion. If you know of any I missed, I’d
love to hear about them!

I’m
also posting this list on a static page, and I’ll be updating it there as I
find more books/more are written.

intj-confessions:

auditorycheesecakes:

onyxjuniper:

frecklesandsky:

I just read this super sad post about this girl who’s asexual and married and everyone is basically telling her that she doesn’t deserve her husband/she’s just a prude/she should just do it anyway.
So I want to tell you all right now that if people tell you this, or if they tell you you’ll never have a relationship, it is BULLSHIT.
My husband is asexual and I’m not. He’s sex repulsed, we don’t have sex, we never have.
And it doesn’t matter to me. You know what does? He does. His mental health and wellbeing matter to me. Because he is my best friend and he’s one of the smartest, kindest, funniest people I’ve ever met. And he’s had people tel him that he’s broken and it makes me SO ANGRY because they are WRONG.
Being different doesnt mean you’re broken.
If you don’t like sex/don’t want it/etc. Do not let anyone tell you that you’re inferior because you’re not.
Do not let anyone convice you that you’ll never have a relationship because they’re wrong(if you want one).
You are not broken, and it will be okay.

This made me feel really good. Remember this, for all my ace spectrum friends out there

#it’s really reassuring to hear from the partner #the one who’s not ace #but is totally cool with having no sex #loves her husband anyway #is in a stable and happy relationship #it’s such a relief when you discover that asexuality is a thing #that you’re okay #but then you start to wonder if it means your only chance at not ending up alone is finding someone else who’s also ace #but no #turns out it’s not #that’s really good to hear #so #thanks #so ace #so space

I hope you don’t mind me reblogging your tags but these are my feelings EXACTLY

I’m always a little nervous that I’m not “good enough” for a “real relationship” because sex isn’t on the table. So yeah, these stories are reassuring

The amount of pressure from society to have sex is incredible. We’re told it’s linked to relationship health and if you’re not willing to do every damn thing you’re labeled a prude. It’s incredibly disheartening, especially considering how one’s libido can change over the years even if you’re not ace. Nice to see a supportive piece from a partner.

Hello friends. I am currently a herteromantic asexual that has gotten into my area’s Ace Hunt. I have managed to sabotage several missions, and helped many asexuals get away. But…I think they’re onto me. What do I do??

aceproblems:

You’ve done your job, get out. It’s too dangerous. You have gained us a lot of information and been a valuable asset, leave the rest to the others. Take the first left, then go straight for a couple of metres. After that take a left, two rights, another left and finally climb the ladder. There should be a motorbike with a safehouse’s location programmed into it. Take the bike and we will discuss other matters later.

bunswithknives:

hey, the moment you say het/aces are not straight you’re also saying that homo/aces are not gay so maybe idk… think about it this way. implying that homo/aces are not gay is basically saying that gay people only care about sex which is, you know, Not True and definitely homophobic.

except “straight” is usually taken to mean “heteroromantic heterosexual” and “not queer”, and I’m not that. “gay” tends to be a wider term, as well as an umbrella term for all kinds of queer people. When “gay” is used as its basic meaning, “homosexual”, then, yeah, homo aces are not gay either, because they’re not allo. saying het aces are straight erases them from lgbt+ spaces, suggests they don’t face acephobia and/or misguided homophobia (which they do)… in general, by saying that you assume that het aces have straight priviledge which, surprise surprise, they don’t.

so, yeah, I’m not straight. and my fellow het aces aren’t either.